Silver lining and a cancerversary

Silver lining and a Cancerversary

Written Jun 12, 2012 2:48pm by Heather Dalik

At Gretchen and Amy's encouragement I am trying to see the silver lining.  Here is what I came up with last night as I shivered in bed with 103 fever - 

1.  Strep has ping-ponged back to Grace.  Now, she has scarlet fever too.  Silver lining - she is so sweet when she is sick

2.  I have strep, double ear infections, and high fever.  Silver lining - Jeff stayed home most of today so I could sleep.

3.  Dr. Skippy (Gretchen's term for overzealous young doctor) told me there was no way my self diagnosis was correct "You look too good for that diagnosis" he told me.  Silver lining - Maybe he was hitting on me.

4.  Prescriptions are expensive.  I have filled 9 prescriptions in two weeks.  Silver lining - in 42 short days we met our insurance deductible for the year.  My prescriptions last night cost $0.  Quick investigation revealed that we have met our $2400 deductible, although the bills haven't come yet.  This means all future prescriptions "should" be $0.  Now, we will tackle that much larger number called "out of pocket maximum".  

5.  Cora takes her last dose of cyclosporin (anti rejection medication) tomorrow night.  Silver lining - I will no longer have to feel bad when she cringes from the taste.  She will be down to one medication administered only on Sat and Sun.  

6.  This is the first week of summer vacation and we are spending it on quarantine.  Silver lining - the kids don't seem to mind.  I am not sure they realized summer has officially started.

So, stay clear of my house and my kids for a few more days.  I hope we are well by the weekend.  We have a very important birthday party to attend.  This brings me to the Cancerversary.  I had no idea there was such a word.  If I felt better, I would head out to the Hallmark store to see if there is a card for this milestone.  A Cancerversary is a cancer diagnosis anniversary.  Today is Amy's Cancerversary.  Today, 4 years ago, 38 weeks pregnant, Amy found out she had cancer.  4 days later Amy delivered a healthy baby girl and started treatment a few weeks later.  Amy spent the first year of Kira's life enduring chemo and radiation.  Her family rallied together and took care of Amy and her newborn.  Amy and Craig got through that year and went on to have Khloe (who shares a birthday with Cora).  

Jeff and I met Amy and Craig a few months before Cora got sick.  I have to admit I struggled with the notion of what we possibly have in common since she is something like 14 years younger than I am.  (I laugh all the time that her father and Jeff are the same age!)  Chemo, hair loss, new friends, lost friends, soul searching, and celebration of our medical successes are what we have in common, not to mention strong willed girls and independent toddlers.    

I am pretty sure my journey would have be tons lonelier if I didn't have Amy.  "Show me your port scar", "How was it without hair?", "What did you do when people stared at you?", "Are you scared of relapse?", "Did you plan your funeral?", "How do you get through the hard days?" - all my questions she answers with a smile and sometimes a laugh.  She brings me lunch when I need it and talks me through things, no matter what time of night.  We laugh at our girls as they become independent toddlers.  She loves my kids as if they were her own.  She will be Grace's "cool adult friend" who shares a love bling and fill in where Mom won't do.  

Critical illness isn't something you wish for but when you are handed it, you have to make the best of it.  Today, Amy told me she would spend the day reflecting and thinking about all the awesome people she has met as a result of cancer.  Today, I will celebrate my dear friend Amy, her cancer and our friendship.  Livestrong, my friend!

Be CORAgeous!